Why I Run Marathons with My Dad
Its not really a race. It never is. It is about who you are when you cross the finish line and who you discover you get to be on your way there. - Angela Hubbs
It was 2014 when I got into the triathlon world.
I love it!
I love it because of the community, the challenge, the gadgets, and most of all who I have to be to cross the finish line. I’m not fast, but I don’t care! I really just enjoy everything about race day. I love setting up my bike and listening to the announcer. I love watching all the other people prepare. I love supporting others especially if they haven’t done one before.
Once my dad started seeing me in the triathlon world he got excited about what he was capable of too. He has shoulder stuff so he def can’t swim and I don’t think he even had interest in road biking. He watched the live feed of me when I crossed the finish line in Muskoka, Canada for my first ironman and he seemed excited about what completing a marathon would do for his soul. I never ever had any interest in doing marathons. Every time I saw “I’ll never do X,” I always find myself signed up for it!
Every year for the the last 5 or so years, we go on some adventure together. One year we went skiing. A few years in a row, we hung out with my aunt and uncle for the 4th of july. But the last few years we have run half and full marathons as our yearly bonding activity.
This year my dad was with me and my boyfriend when he got the call from his doctor. He was sitting right next to me when the C word entered into my life yet again! The good news is we were at the happiest place on the planet (Disney) and my dad has such a sunny, positive disposition that I knew we could handle anything together. It was september when he had a procedure done that would remove all cancer from his body. It was June when we ran our 3 half marathon together. Talk about a trooper…
The truth is we were aiming to actually finish the marathon but neither of us really trained for it. I mean it hadn’t been that long since my dad’s surgery when you look at the grand scheme of things so I was so proud of him. He was disappointed we didn’t finish the full marathon.
“Dad, a half is nothing to sneeze at! I love this distance!” My boyfriend and I do halfs together. My boy has no intention at all in doing a full and I love that my body isn’t totally destroyed by it either. It’s funny that I would much rather do a full ironman than just a marathon. (An ironman is a 2.4 mile swim, 112 mile bike ride and a full marathon 26.2 mile run, but its just so different that I would prefer it!)
“No, I want to be like that guy,” he always seems to find the one really old dude that passes us. “I want to climb that mountain top!”, my dad will say.
I get it.
So, we continue to dream about completing another marathon, full marathon together. We have only officially completed one together. The Marine Corps marathon. That was emotional for me because my dad is in the military and when we went down what is called the blue mile, which is a mile of pictures of fallen soldiers and people holding flags, he knew some of them. It really made it real for me that my dad could have been one of those soldiers even though he is clergy.
In the mean time, in the same year we completed another race purely for the medal! It began with San Diego. Luckily my dad lives there so it was easy. But we discovered if we plan to go to San Jose we would get a medal for doing both races. If we completed the 5k before hand that would be another medal. If we followed it with the half that’s another medal for that, than a medal for doing both the 5k and the half… this is getting ridiculous. You mean we get 5 medals for the weekend? Yep! So stupid but so fun! These Rock n Roll folks know how to market!
We completed a 5k around the city of San Jose. That was fun. The area reminded me of a smaller soho. Art on buildings, hipsters walking around and food from everywhere. and in retrospect I definitely pushed my dad too hard. He PRed on his 5k time. The next day we did the half marathon and by mile 7 he was fading and by mile 10 he was totally cooked. Before then we were rockin’ though! I giggled and thanked every cop I saw. I clapped along with the bands we passed and kept checking in my dad who was doing everything he could to keep it together and keep moving. He was breathing great but his legs just didn’t want to cooperate.
It never ever crosses my mind during a race that I won’t finish though. Then only way out is through i say to myself. Even crawling, we would have finished and we did. We jogged across the finish line. I know he was hurting in his body and I know he was disappointed because he felt like he was holding me back. I felt a little disappointed in the beginning too because we started off so strong, but then I remember that’s not why I do this with him.
I run with my dad because I love being with him. We don’t do anything spectacular aside from running a stupid distance for a medal shape. We giggle and laugh at nothing. We dance to no music. We are friendly with others. We just be. And thats why I run with my dad. To Be… with him.
Now I know he desperately wants to be able to finish another marathon where he is running the entire time. And he will (if he actually trains for it ;-)) but any opportunity I get to simply Be in his presence is satisfying for the likes of this competitive triathlete.
